5 Reasons leaving your high control religion won’t fix your binary thinking

In high-control religions, a prominent “us vs them” dynamic distinguishes believers (the in-group) from non-believers or followers of other faiths (the out-group). This dichotomy fosters a sense of superiority among believers while isolating them from critical thinking and interaction with outsiders. High-control religions discourage questioning, reinforcing the divide and limiting perspectives.

Here are some reasons that it can be challenging to let go of binary thinking, even after leaving high control religion.

1. Socialization Patterns

   • High-control religions often emphasize a clear divide between right and wrong, good and evil, and believers and non-believers, fostering a sense of superiority and exclusivity among believers while labeling outsiders as misguided or dangerous. This "us vs them" mentality hinders trust and critical thinking among members, reinforcing the divide and limiting alternative perspectives. Exiting the religion does not automatically erase these deeply ingrained socialization patterns.

2. Psychological Conditioning

   • Individuals raised within high-control religions may have experienced indoctrination and been psychologically conditioned to think in binary terms from an early age. Even after leaving the religion, these ingrained thought patterns can persist and may require conscious effort to overcome.

3. Cultural Influence

   • Binary thinking is not solely confined to religious contexts but is also prevalent in broader cultural and societal spheres. Leaving a high-control religion does not necessarily remove one from the broader cultural influences that may reinforce binary thinking patterns.

4. Personal Identity

   • For many individuals, religious beliefs and identity are deeply intertwined. Leaving a high-control religion can create identity crises and uncertainties, leading individuals to seek new sources of certainty and belonging, which may still reinforce binary thinking in different contexts.

5. Lack of Exposure to Alternatives

   • Individuals leaving high-control religions may not have been exposed to alternative ways of thinking or engaging with the world. Without intentional efforts to explore diverse perspectives and challenge binary thinking, individuals may continue to perceive the world in simplistic, dichotomous terms.

Beyond religion, this mentality fuels black-and-white thinking, stifling dialogue across social, political, and cultural spheres. Unlearning this mindset is crucial for fostering inclusivity, dismantling barriers, and combating conflict and stereotypes. Shedding the “us vs them” mindset promotes personal growth by challenging biases, embracing diversity, and fostering respectful dialogue.

Deconstructing religion involves critiquing teachings that perpetuate the in-group/out-group dynamic and embracing diverse perspectives. By unlearning this mentality, individuals cultivate empathy, recognizing shared humanity and fostering a nuanced understanding of spirituality. This transformation leads to personal growth, intellectual exploration, and a compassionate worldview.